The year 2025 has been an exceptional one for me, and I am deeply grateful for the opportunity to look back and reflect on its many blessings. The best part is that I’m not only reflecting in my heart, but also in writing—and I hope these words encourage someone reading.
To begin with, 2025 has been a year of sowing into good ground (Matthew 13), and I can’t thank God enough for that privilege. Looking at my 2024/2025 New Year’s resolutions, I laugh at myself a little. Was I silly for writing them down? Certainly not! But I learned firsthand the truth of Proverbs 19:21: “Many are the plans in a man’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.”
I had so many plans—yet there was one important thing missing, something that caused me to cry often at the beginning of the year.
I needed to surrender one thing to God: my heart.
Was it easy? No. I struggled to take control back many times, until I finally recognized my own “foolishness” and surrendered everything to Him. I’ve been a committed believer for about 15 years, yet it never truly occurred to me that a believer can still harbor unhealthy things in their heart. I wasn’t being a hypocrite; I simply didn’t understand that a believer must continuously guard and work on their heart, because “out of it spring the issues of life” (Proverbs 4:23).
Our heart isn’t just emotions—it’s our thoughts, our reactions, the wellspring of our lives. I spent years drafting plans A through Z, sprinkling a little “God” on them, and convincing myself He was involved. I broke my own heart countless times, developed unhealthy attachments to trivial things, and became sad, bitter, depressed, full of self-pity, and at one point even believed God had abandoned me.
The first step toward total surrender for me was Jeremiah 33:3:
“Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and show thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.”
I called on God—not as someone pretending to be strong, but as someone acknowledging her burdens and desire for rest (Matthew 11:28–30). A pastor friend invited me to a church where they conducted a three-day water fast, and that became the foundation of my transformation. I had done 21-day and 14-day fasts before, but never a water-only fast. I committed to it with one goal in mind: to get a job, because at the time I was unemployed. After the fast, I applied for an international job, got an interview, but didn’t make it. I was crushed, because I still hadn’t seen what God was showing me—my desire was focused on having my plans fulfilled.
But when I came to God sincerely, He led me to repentance. I realized I had silently carried or accepted things that darkened my heart. Only then did I understand that I had been my own enemy for a long time. My heart needed freedom—from hurt, fear, rejection, bitterness, self-condemnation, negative words, and so much more. I cried often because those things had clouded my mind and affected my thinking in many ways.
As I spent time studying the Word of God, He revealed Himself to me through every verse. I engaged in practices that quieted my thoughts—and God spoke to me. The most beautiful part wasn’t just that He revealed things to come, but that He showed me patterns to break, people and situations draining my spirit, and the next steps to focus on.
Today, I am grateful for the woman I am becoming—learning, growing, loving, and being led by God. I haven’t shared every step of my transformation, but if you’re reading this and you’re tired of carrying burdens that aren’t meant for you, feel free to reach out. I would love to share scriptures that strengthened me.
I am a work in progress, and by God’s grace,
I am no longer who I used to be.
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation…” — 2 Corinthians 5:17.
Have a Blessed New Year!
Comments
Post a Comment