Today, we are celebrating fathers, not only our daddies but all the daddies in the world. Few days back my mother was telling me of a father whose daughter was slightly bruised by a schoolmate. Though the child who did it was a bit of a bully, the father of the little girl who was bruised could not bear the sight of the bruise. He was ready to go to any length to get back at the boy. Well, you may look at it like he’s exaggerating, what I see is a protective father. Believe me when I say there are fathers who hate any kind of play around their children especially if they get hurt. Just like this father, many others are that protective of their children and hate to see them hurt. There are fathers who do menial jobs to send their children to school. There are some fathers who are dealing with so much stress all because they can’t keep their children hungry or homeless. We have different experiences with our fathers and as fathers but one thing is certain, fathers love the best way they can. While some fathers are very expressive of how they feel toward their children, others are quiet and strict and yet very concerned about the wellbeing of their family.
Dear brethren in Christ, (I felt led to write this) your father may not have been the best father on the planet. He may have had some fails that hurt you and your family, maybe you feel he was always busy either making money or never at home. You may hate your father because of some things he did that you didn’t appreciate. You may be calling your father names in your heart or sometimes aloud because you never felt his impact in your life. Your father may have left you when you were younger and it still hurts you big time. There are so many things you dislike about your father, for which I don’t blame you but please, forgive him. I earlier said everyone loves just the best way they can, while some are open about their love for their families others aren’t. Some of these fathers may have hurts they are dealing with that you may not be aware of. Some of our fathers grew up with stack illiterate fathers who had their way of showing love which wasn’t the best and our fathers only got it from them. Some of our father’s became ‘daddies’ even before understanding the responsibilities that come with being a father (I’m getting emotional). Maybe some of our fathers didn’t get the chance of having a father and so they did whatever to the best of their abilities. Maybe some of these fathers were emotionally neglected almost always and they too are yet to recover even though they are already fathers.
Brethren, we don’t love people because of the good things they do to us, we don’t forgive them simply because they apologize. We can love people who have hurt us, we can forgive them, not because of anything they have done or can do because it’ll free us from hurt. You may be struggling to love or forgive your father for reasons best known to you, but for your sanity and health’ sake, let go. Do therapy to forgive and love, do therapy to heal but please forgive your father if he wronged you. If he’s alive, you may write a letter to him or visit him to understand why everything went the way it went. Don’t assume he did it intentionally, it may be something you can resolve and get over. Some of us have very kind and concerned fathers and yet we don’t appreciate them because we think they’re either intruding our private space or desperate for affection. Some of our fathers work very hard to give us children what they can afford but we don’t appreciate them because we compare them to other fathers.
I may not have put it in the right words but I plead with you to show your father love not only today but every other day. Just like you, they make mistakes (even bigger mistakes) and yet they long for love and affection from their loved ones not judgements. No one likes rejection even if they rejected others. Make a commitment with yourself to forgive and love the man who is the reason you’re alive, handsome/beautiful, strong and look the way you do. You’re unique and it’s thanks to him. He’s your father and will always be.
PRAYER
Gracious Father, we thank You for our fathers, we thank you for healing us of all the hurts and pains we have been through with them. Thank you for your wisdom and understanding that enables us to understand how not to judge other people by their actions. We receive your mercy Father, for everything that has hurt us, frustrated us and even made us doubt You. We receive the grace to love and forgive even those who have hurt us deeply. Help our Fathers to be strong, to treat us with love and grace. In Jesus’ Name we have prayed with thanksgiving. AMEN
Fathers are a Blessing!
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