WHAT DO YOU SEEK IN MARRIAGE?

We are few days away from Valentine’s Day and with all the love in the air, preparations for surprises and all, there is this little question I will like each one of us to answer. What do you seek in a relationship/ marriage? Some weeks ago, I read an article about the different kinds of marriages. She wrote from a wife’s point of view but I will write from a single Christian’s point of view. Quite a lot of young people are excited about getting married (it’s not bad in itself because it’s every young woman’s dream) but excitement is likely going to produce impatience which can sometimes obstruct our understanding of what we desire in marriage. When I talk of what you’re looking for, I don’t mean you should write a bucket list of everything you want your future spouse to be. What I mean here is, you should lay aside everything ‘expectation’ about your future spouse and you should face reality straight up. Why do you want to get married in the first place? Is it because of the other person’s wealth? Is it because you want to be free from your family? Is it because you want to have children? Think well on what you want because that’s what you will give into the marriage. If it’s money, you will be ambitious about meeting those who are not only financially stable but who also have investments that can sustain a luxurious lifestyle. If it’s freedom from parental/ family control, you want to be the captain of your life and decisions. If it’s about having children, your focus will be more on the children than the one you are having the children with. If you want to be married because of the title, ‘MRS’, your happiness will be dependent on how well people respect you. Don’t forget that your reason for marrying a person will determine the length of that relationship. It is also worthy of note, that not all couples living together are still married or are happy together.

If you are not married, this is the best time to define what you seek in marriage. Nobody wants to be loved by someone today and tomorrow you’re breaking up like the relationship meant nothing. It hurts; the pain is so deep that not everyone recovers easily. It’s every young Christian woman’s dream to be found by a man who is relentlessly pursuing Christ and is ready to share that life with you. Thus, the kind of relationship we should seek in marriage should be a CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE.

A Christ-centered marriage is one in which Jesus Christ is the foundation on which it is built. It’s a union between a man and a woman who love Jesus and are willing to serve Him together. In this kind of marriage, the couple acknowledges the Lordship of Jesus Christ over every area of their lives. They are conscious that He is their wisdom, strength, understanding and above all the Author of their love.  They study the Word of God and pray together as well serve in their local ministry or church; giving for the spread of the Gospel and for the work of God. The husband is committed to teach his family about the love of God which is in Jesus Christ while the wife co-leads in humility and submission honoring her husband in every way possible. They show grace in each other’s weaknesses and they forgive one another when they go wrong. It will not be a perfect union but the joy of their marriage will come from the Spirit of God in them.

This kind of marriage is not accidental it is Authored by the Almighty God alone. You cannot see anybody’s heart unless the Spirit reveals it to you and I believe only Him can bring such a couple together. Surrender your desire for a godly spouse to Him and let Him bring you a spouse who will serve earnestly with you.

You’re Blessed!!!