THE PERFECT RELATIONSHIP

There are so many ideas everywhere about relationships; some perfect and others not. And I ask myself is there such a thing as a perfect relationship? Well, maybe or maybe not,  it all depends on what we call a perfect relationship. To some people a perfect relationship is one in which the couple has been together for long and are still going strong, to others it’s when a couple is always clingy and all smiley, to some people it is a relationship where the couple have quite a difference of age thus there will some sort of maturity exercised. To others it has to do with experience; that is the man and the woman have had tough love and heart breaking experiences and have settled with one another. To some people still, a perfect relationship is one in which the couple is young and they are both in their first real relationships etc. With these ideas in mind, people carry ideas and thoughts of past relationships and drag them into new relationships or they take social media or movie relationship ideas and try to impose them on their relationships. Be careful because this is the shortest way to ruin your relationship. Don’t train your mind to believe that when you are in a relationship your stomach will churn daily when you see the person or hear his name being mentioned around you, don’t believe that you will go to sleep with pictures of him running in your mind like the road runner or you will always wake up with super love text messages or you will scream ‘I love you’ on rooftops. Don’t always put perfect pictures of you two in your mind because you just might end up disappointed. He will not always say what you want to hear or what you had anticipated, he will be himself in every regard and thus my idea of a perfect relationship is REALITY.

In a perfect relationship you are yourself, you smile as you always do and walk like you always do. Don’t forget that the person you are dating fell in love with the real you and not an imaginary figure and so you should remain you. You cannot change who you are but can modify and modify doesn’t imply you going crazy trying to make an impression. You can be silly and crazy but the fact that it’s who you are, you are loved as you. Small things about life can ruin your date or you can be late at some point for a date. Your jobs or school is part of your reality as a couple, your family and friends make up your reality. So there will be days when you won’t be able to go on that perfect date or see your ‘sweetheart’ because of some of these reasons; ‘I won’t close early from work’ or ‘my mom needs me to do something for her’ or ‘my bestie lost a loved one’ etc. As Christians, we shouldn’t train ourselves to believe that a guy will come to you only for marriage and thus even when he’s trying to court you, you are anticipating nothing short of the proposal. Most of us Christian women think that to show how Christian a guy is, he has to recount all the bible stories from Genesis to Revelation or he has to always be formally dressed or all perfect in everything. Don’t try to compare carnality and spirituality. There are qualities that we attribute to people’s physique that is not from within, it’s a façade they are putting up because they know that is what we want to see.You can never bring baggage from a previous experience into a new relationship and expect to be happy. Mark 2:22 says “"And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. For the wine would burst the wineskins, and the wine and the skins would both be lost. New wine calls for new wineskins."(New Living Translation). A new relationship calls for new realizations.  Live in the ‘NOW’ of your relationship and make the most out of it discarding every idea you may have previously had about love relationships. 

You’re blessed!!